two little letters. “be.” how can i be so bad at two little letters? i am really good at two different letters. “go.” i can go go go all day long. but to just be. that is a hard one for me. anyone else struggle with the practice of just be-ing?
i have a running group text with my college girlfriends. we discuss all kinds of things from kids to husbands, goals, prayer intentions, pictures, and laughs. last week, we were discussing resolutions. my friend beth said she thought her resolution would be to just "be" more often. this really resonated with me. she said she has a tendency to overthink past and future and wouldn’t it be nice to just be. why yes, yes it would.
a couple weeks ago, we were on a plane, headed to celebrate the christmas season with our florida family. before we even took off, my two-year-old daughter fell asleep leaning against my shoulder. she eventually ended up in my lap with her hand resting in mine. i had hoped to get some pictures organized during the flight, but with her in my lap there wasn’t much i could do without waking her. i decided to just "be." i have to say, it was nearly impossible. i couldn’t help but think about all the things i could accomplish in two hours, with one sleeping kiddo and another engrossed in disney movies. i whispered a few prayers and then focused on my sleeping daughter. as i gave myself time to just "be," i was slowly overwhelmed by a sense of peace i rarely feel. i wasn’t overthinking past or future. i was just there in the moment.
when beth mentioned her resolution to just "be," i was immediately taken back to that time on the plane with K. had i not decided to just "be" on that flight, the sweetness of the moment with my daughter would have been lost. but that was two weeks ago. since that time, i can't think of another moment where which i allowed myself to just "be."
this is clearly going to take me a lot more practice. a lot of whispering “be” to myself in all the moments i am doing the exact opposite. so if it looks like i am talking to myself, well that’s why. if you've been nodding your head along with this resolution, come, join me in this journey to just "be." i can't wait to hear about your triumphs. happy be-ing!